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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

To Be Or Not To Be....That Is A Very Good Question.

Please be mindful of any comments you decide to leave, it took a lot to post this and open up.

The random quotes are quotes I have found and love. All can be found here: Pinterest: Words of Wisdom

As most of you know, I am pregnant! Henry and I are learned we are expecting our first child just a few short months following our wedding we planned for 2 1/2 years.

During our wedding planning process I learned a lot about myself, Henry, our personal styles and who in our life was really willing to go the extra mile, and who just wanted to be present when there was a crowd to save-face. 

I had friends and family willing to do whatever they could whether they lived down the street or hours away. People driving hours to be there for me just for a day, people skyping with me to see what they could do to help and people doing something as simple as texting me and asking if I was ok. Wedding planning was stressful people! LOL I definitely learned, no matter how much time you have, something will go wrong. It's inevitable. You just have to grit your teeth and laugh it off. 

Then there were other friends and family members that claimed they would do this or that, wanted to help this way or that way, but when it came down to it, they were no where to be found. BUT the day of the wedding they were there showing their pearly whites and acting like they had been there for me the entire process. 

Now that I am pregnant I find some of the same people, doing the same thing. 

To be or not to be a part of my life, that is the question. 
How many chances do you give someone?
 How long do you go on pretending you don't care? 
How long do you pretend their snide comments don't bother you?
How long do you allow them to pretend to the world they are your best "friend" and would do anything for you, when in fact behind closed doors they do nothing?

Going to college was a real eye-opener for me. I got to meet a lot of new people, and see how other people lived their lives. How different relationships functioned. I learned that some of the relationships I had thought were normal, were actually extremely dysfunctional, such as my boyfriend of 5 years at the time. Holy Guacamole was that the most dysfunctional relationship ever, but before going to college, I thought it was the bees-knees. Sad really.

Talking with my amazing sister-in-law today at lunch made me realize a lot. I love her much like my own little sister because both ladies are real. They don't pretend to be someone they are not. They are honest, truthful even when the truth hurts, real, smart, funny, dependable and so much more than a girl could dream of asking for from two women. I know I can talk to either girl, tell them the truth, even when it may be negative towards them and they listen with open ears and hearts. I don't ever have to feel like I am walking on glass when talking to them and same for them with me. The only other girls in my life that are this way would be my best friends Danni, Taylor and Riki. Another great thing about all these ladies and we all know, you don't say something behind someones back if you would be ashamed if they found out, or wouldn't say it to their face. It's a way a lot of women should be, but sadly in our society a lot of women gossip and honestly don't know how to be REAL.

I realized I am exerting a lot of wonderful energy on things that don't deserve energy at all. I am pregnant for petes sake and could be using all this productive energy on the future nursery, shopping, scrapbooking, re-organzing my craft room, taking day trips, surprising the Hubby with a new garage work-station, and oh, did I mention shopping? I am GREAT at shopping. HA! 

There are always going to be people in your life who love you and tolerate you through good and bad. 
Kind of like wedding vows. 
People who not only expect respect, but give it to.
No one is perfect.
People fuck up. Pardon my french.
At the end of the day it is up to you who you allow in your life. 
You choose who to give your time and energy too.
No one can force you to do anything you truly don't want to do.

"Sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strong relationship." Margaret Mead

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